Love Is Everything | A Valentine’s or Whenever Devotional

As we near Valentine’s Day next week, “love” is everywhere.

Or a version of it, anyway. But what is real love? Just how important is it?

The first verse from 1 Corinthians 13 has been ringing in my ears for I don’t know how long:

If I speak with the tongues of mankind and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
1 Corinthians 13:1 NASB

Love is pretty important then, since our efforts are wasted without it. So let’s break this thing down.

Breaking The “L” Word Down

Love is patient, love is kind, it is not jealous; love does not brag, it is not arrogant. It does not act disgracefully, it does not seek its own benefit; it is not provoked, does not keep an account of a wrong suffered, it does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; it keeps every confidence, it believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8a NASB

We often refer to red flags when someone is looking for a relationship, right? This is a great scripture to have that boyfriend-seeker zero in on.

Is that potential boyfriend patient, kind, not jealous, not braggy, not arrogant, graceful, does not seek his own benefit, not provoked, doesn’t keep record of wrongs, doesn’t rejoice in unrighteousness, rejoices in truth, doesn’t gossip but keeps people’s confidences …

Hello, green flag! And although that’s great if he’s showing these traits to his girlfriend or fiancée, as believers we are called to love everyone, even our enemies (see Matthew 5:43-44).

Zeroing In

Taking it a step further, all you looking for a spouse… does he/she act that way toward their family, friends, coworkers, or even the people that rub him/her the wrong way?

Yes?

No?

Sure, you will never find a perfect spouse. We’re human. But does this fabulous person DESIRE to walk in this kind of love? Who doesn’t get rattled when encountering someone with opposite political opinions to them but can still manage to show kindness, and when that argumentative person walks away … do they manage to speak gracefully about them?

If you’re considering marrying someone, ponder what their behaviors and attitudes might be based on how they treat other people. When you’re dating, it’s easy to show your best side. But when marriage comes, there will be difficult times. There might be wilderness seasons. When the wine press comes and squeezes, what fruit will be produced in that marriage potential you’re pursuing?

Take a Seat in the Hot Seat

Do this same test on YOURSELF. Singles, engaged folk, marrieds, divorced, widowed … can you say that you operate in this?

Are you patient, kind, not jealous, not braggy, not arrogant, graceful, don’t seek your own benefit, not provoked, don’t keep record of wrongs, don’t rejoice in unrighteousness, rejoice in truth, don’t gossip but keep people’s confidences …

Do you love well? A good test for this is … do you forgive well?

Ouch. I felt that too.

Unforgiveness hurts the unforgiver the most, but …

Actually, no. Wait. Could it be possible that when you or I choose not to forgive, it might even hurt the ones we love even more? Because unforgiveness poisons us. It changes us, makes us bitter, resentful … sour, even.

Blah. How can someone holding onto unforgiveness (in any way, toward any one) love well?

I’ll maybe do a post going deeper into forgiveness soon, but today’s focus is love.

And love is everything.

Yes, everything.

But Amy, you might say, “That almost sounds like a Beatles song.”

(Sorry if you’re now humming “all we need is love”.)

Check out this verse:

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.
1 John 4:7,8 ESV

If as believers God is everything to us, and God is love …

Then love is everything, crucially important, because He is love.

Not lust, so don’t confuse that with it. Not perversion, and there’s lots of that to go around.

He is love.

Is this a Valentine’s Day Devotional?

Yes. And an any day devotional, but I think Valentine’s Day, being a designated day when we show the ones we love our affection, is a good time to go, “Hey, am I really loving my spouse/family the way Christ wants me to?”

When my husband and I were first married, my husband modelled well how to bless me. He left notes for me everywhere (I think our past houses must still have some of them), he had coffee prepped for me, he found ways to take pressure off of me even though he was carrying a huge load in college at the time. (He still does these things 🙂 )

And with him modelling this, we became a great team, taking pressure off of each other and finding little ways to show kindness to each other.

He was in the army for ten years of our marriage, and I remember this one time when he got home from an exercise or something … I took a bag of garbage out and when I got back inside he had already placed a new garbage bag in the bin.

I started to cry, and he let out a chuckle, gathered me in his arms, and said, “It’s the little things, huh?”

Another time he accidentally broke something as soon as he got home from a trip, and I said to him, “You can break every dish in this house. I’m just glad you’re home.”

Not sure how that last story fits into this post, but it’s cute, so I’ll give it for free.

Can’t Get Away from the Forgiveness Thing

This Valentines Day, or whatever day you read this, don’t hang onto the past. Don’t zero in on the petty.

Even if you were really wronged and had to put up boundaries and space (not just talking marriage here, but any relationship) forgiveness is your key to freedom.

Love is everything, because God is everything. And God is love.

So love well. And forgive well. Jesus loved you so much He died for you (John 3:16) on the cross 2000 years ago. Then as he was hanging there, He asked God the Father to forgive his killers (see Luke 23:34).

That level of forgiveness might sound impossible to you, friend. You might have been broken and beaten. I hope you’ll find a pastor or counsellor to talk with and to walk a road to healing with you.

(And if you’re in an abusive relationship, please seek help. When I say forgive, that’s an internal thing at this stage that you might need to make a choice for daily. Forgiveness does not mean staying in an abusive situation.)

When my kids tell me “I can’t”—for anything—I tell them to ask God for help. Making impossible, possible, is God’s thing. So lets do that in a prayer together. The prayer I share here is short, but if you journal (or even if you don’t) I encourage you to spend five minutes journaling about God’s love and anything that has pricked your heart in this devotional. Set a timer and write until the timer goes.

Thanks for reading! I hope you were blessed by this devotional. If you’d like to send me a prayer request or thoughts on this post, you can message me through my contact page. Or comment below.

If you liked this Valentine’s or whenever devotional, I do have one more from years back. Click here to read it.

Further reading
1 John 4:7-21; 1 Corinthians 13; Ephesians 3:14-19; Psalm 103:11-13

A Prayer

God, You are love. Thank you for loving me and forgiving me, time and time again. Help me to love well and forgive well, too. Help me to have a revelation of both of those things. Sometimes forgiving feels impossible. Help me to forgive and to keep forgiving, to love my family, and my neighbors—even the hard ones. The way you love is so amazing, so pure, so genuine. Thank you for it. Help me remember to call on you in my struggles. Heal my heart so I can love well.

In Jesus’ name. Amen.

A Moment of Worship

New Flash Fiction Story

As this devotional posts, a flash fiction story of mine (Two Non-Psychopaths in the Ice Storm of ‘98) and eleven other writer’s stories are being published with Spark Flash Fiction. The feature author for this collection is Becky Wade!

Go check it out, and if you’re within the voting period, vote for your favorite!